It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
