Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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