that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
