People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
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