The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but...
Actually, she's fat now, so...
Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
