Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Randomize
