So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Randomize
