you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
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