So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Randomize
