I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Randomize
