I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize
