i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
When did angry sex become our thing?
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize
