Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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