i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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