weddingsv make me drug and hornr
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Randomize
