Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
