found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
