she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Randomize
