I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Randomize
