We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
