a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
