ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
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Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
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