They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Randomize
