Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
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