Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Randomize
