He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
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