I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
She announced her abortion via fbk
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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