hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
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