But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Randomize
