Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Randomize
