i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
