dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Randomize
