summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Randomize
