I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
Randomize
