come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize
