You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Randomize
