I'm laying in your front yard are you home
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Randomize
