im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
I would ride that face into the sunset
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
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