I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
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