I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
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