i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
Randomize
