i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize
