lets start a swedish sibling band together
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Randomize
