He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
