Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
