Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Randomize
