I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize
