So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Randomize
