I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Randomize
