My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
